The Anons of Equestria

by Bastinator

Chapter 4: To Be With Her

Home is so far away, just another blip in the sky. Each one could be yours, but you’ll never know. How could you know? ”They want to keep you here.” Who doesn’t? You’re such a likeable guy. ”Your friends do not want to go home because they already are.” They grew to love this place, and you can see why.

This place is at peace, the ponies are kind, could use more meat though. ”Keep trying to find a way home Anon. Your friends know.” As good as an idea that sounds, fuck you subconscious. ”What?” When I find my way home I’ll make it, but my friends are innocent. So piss off.

~~~

Ponyville, Equestria. End of the first month. Things… well they’re good. Good. Ha, they’re better than that. It almost pains me how ignorant I used to be, how blind I seemed. While I haven’t gotten a job I’ve gained something better, friends. And I’m not talking about just Duff, Anonymous, Mickey and Mous. Rainbow Dash, AJ, Pinkie, all of them. And then there’s Fluttershy.

She’s one of a kind to be sure, but these feelings don’t work for me. She’s not even human, yet… I don’t know. But I do know is that she’s close, closer than any of the people I was with back on Earth. She’s just special I guess. End of Entry.

~~~

”Can you pass the gravy Anon?”

“Sure,” you say handing him the bowl. Anonymous pours it generously over his biscuit and roast potatoes. That jacket didn’t seem to fit him before, but now he’s definitely grown into it. He bulked up more so than you’d care to say since he got here. No doubt thanks to Dash. You’re not looking so bad yourself, though he spends more time with her than you.

Mickey doesn’t pester him as much anymore, but even you can feel the tension between the two of them. It’s not as intense as you remember which is a good sign. You finish off the last of your nachos, it’s brunch after all. ”Any big plans today? Duff asks sipping at his milk.

“Nope. Oh the joys of the unemployed.”

”Glad to see you’re losing that uptight attitude.” You shrug off the cloaked insult as the waitress comes over.

”So how was everything today gentlemen?”

”Fantastic like usual, Drop,” Mickey says.

”Glad to hear it,” she drops off the check and you manage to grab it first.

Mous smirks, “Finally pitching in are you?”

“I don’t spend my money on gifts for a certain pony all the time Mous.”

”You know damn well she needs those supplies,” he snaps, but you see right through his act.

“I’m sure you’re just looking for her to supply something for you.”

This catches him off-guard, “I never-“ He huffs in defeat, “Touche.”

”Speaking of certain ponies,” Anonymous changing the flow of conversation, “I’ve seen you with a certain yellow Pegasus lately.”

“Really? I thought you were so far up Rainbow’s flank all you could see was shit and ass.” Direct hit number two. One more and that’s a turkey. You fish out your bits, Anonymous’s face truly priceless. “And yes, I have been spending time with the nicest pony in Ponyville, thank you very much.”

”If you have no plans, then where are you off to in such a hurry?”

“Never said ‘no.’ I just didn’t have big plans.”

They gawk at your use of logic, “So where are you going?”

“I’m taking Fluttershy to the salon. She’s been busy lately so this is an opportunity for her to relax.” Duff makes a whipping noise and flicks his wrist, earning snickers from the others. “Make all the jokes you want, I still can’t hear you over there in the friend-zone.” You do a jig and moonwalk away as he sits there perplexed. Another one bites the dust.

~~~

You follow your memory back to the spa, Lotus working the counter. ”Ah Anon, it’s good to see you again.”

“Hello Lotus, just checking in to see if everything’s ready.”

”Of course, we’re just waiting for our esteemed guest.” You sigh in relief. You want this to be flawless, Fluttershy deserves as much. ”You spent quite a lot on this appointment. Are you sure you can afford it?”

“I’ll be scrapping the bottom of the barrel, but I’ve got it.”

She nods and hums to herself, “I’ll take your word on that.” The door chimes as the guest of honor walks in. Damn she’s worth it.

”Hi Anon,” she says quietly walking towards the counter.

“Fluttershy, you’re as beautiful as ever.”

She blushes, Lotus cutting in, “Let’s see if we can’t make you even better.”

“I don’t know that’ll be a good trick if you can pull it off.”

”Anon…” she squeaks in embarrassment, her cheeks a shade of scarlet unknown to the world.

You scratch behind her ear, Aloe opening the door. ”Fluttershy? If you’d follow me, we can begin.”

She fidgets around, “Could you- come with me maybe?” You look to Aloe to see if it’s alright and she nods.

“Sure, just don’t expect me to join. I still have a reputation to uphold.”

She grins, “You sound like Rainbow Dash.”

“Then she knows what she’s talking about.” You walk on through the doors and into the main area of the spa. You’ve only been here once and that was only for a few seconds. Aloe gave you the tour when you starting asking about what services they performed. She kept trying to suggest more human-esque services for you, but you made it abundantly clear that you were there for Fluttershy.

Aloe explained it four-odd times to you and you’re still certain she was talking out of her flank. You see the seaweed. You see the bath. You have no idea what the correlation between the two is. It must be magic. There doesn’t seem to be a logical reason. You win this day magical seaweed…

At least Fluttershy seems to be enjoying herself. After that is a trip to the steam room, and boy how fun that is. They seem to be used to it, but the humidity was killer. You were coughing more than a chain smoker on his sixth pack that hour. Fluttershy offered to opt out but you weren’t going to have a word of it. She deserved ever bit of the treatment and you’re going to make sure she gets it.

It’s done before you know it and they move on to the hooficure. It’s like a pedicure, which you know only by name, but with hooves. You watch in confusion as they do some-such thing. If only they had a pamphlet you could read that would help make sense of this. ”Alright that about wraps this up, now onto the massage.”

“I know what that is!” you cheer, immediately recognizing that you spoke aloud. The spa attendants giggle at your embarrassment, but try to stay professional nonetheless.

Fluttershy hops the table and rests her head as Aloe presses lightly on her back. Okay, that looks pretty damn nice. Fluttershy picks up on this rather quickly, “Do you want to join me?”

“As good as that sounds I only covered you.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, take a seat and we can take care of you too. Free of charge.”

“If you insist,” you reply slipping out of your short-sleeved shirt and climbing atop the table thing.

”Lotus,” she calls out, “Care to give Mr. Anon a hoof?”

You see Lotus step out from the front and stroll up beside you. ”So he wanted a little something after all huh?”

”Just a standard massage.”

Fluttershy peeps, “He’s been kinda stressed lately.”

Lotus nods and rests her hoof on your back, “I get why.” You suppress your groan as her hoof grinds into your back just beside your spine. ”She wasn’t kidding, you’ve got knots for days.” Her hoof circles and presses deeper on your back, and by the sound of it Fluttershy’s enjoying it just as much.

“Well I’ve been- Ooh, planning this for a while.” She steps atop your back, your large back able to keep her up easily.

”Well just lay there and enjoy.”

You smile at Fluttershy and she returns with her own. “It’s hard not to.” You might have to come back for this…

~~~

”Alright so your total comes to about…” she slides a sheet before you. Your eyes pop at the balance, but you were expecting that. You pull out your bag of bits before Fluttershy finishes up and sees you. You feel about ten pounds lighter after the transaction and it leaves you with about… Five bits. Just after you’d given Mous shit for spending all his money on gifts. Welp, worth it.

The door eases open as Lotus counts your payment, Fluttershy stepping out. “Wow.” She’s… words don’t do her justice.

”You’re about four bits short.” Lotus drags you back to reality and you apologize for the miscount, handing over the remaining balance. One bit. Well thankfully there’s leftovers back home.

”You didn’t have to spend all that money on me,” Fluttershy protests shyly.

“It’s fine. I wanted to.”

”But you said how short you are on money, I could’ve-“

You put a hand on her neck calmly, silencing her. “I wanted to do something special for you so I saved up.”

”But, but-“

“Don’t worry about me Fluttershy. As long as you’re happy, I’m happy.”

She nudges you, “You don’t need to bring me to a spa to make me happy.”

“That doesn’t mean don’t bring her.“ Lotus adds like a good salesmare.

”I’m happy just to be with you Anon.”

You rub your head and cover your mouth as you stifle your laughter. “I wish you’d told me that before I blew away all my cash,” you joke. She leans into you as you walk out the spa, both relaxed and strapped for cash. At least you got a massage out of it.

”So what else are you doing today, you know, if you want to tell me?”

“I was thinking about heading up to Sweet Apple Acres, earn some of my cash back.”

”I- I could pay you.”

“I’m not going to take your money Fluttershy. It doesn’t feel right.”

”Okay…” She lowers her head a bit.

“Were you offering me a job?”

”There’s so many animals, I don’t have the time. I thought you might want to help.”

You look at her with suspicion. “I wouldn’t classify that as a job.”

”It’s okay…” You hush her by holding her tight.

“I’d be enjoying myself too much for it to be work.” There’s that smile you love.

Did you just say love? Yep you did. At least you used it in the right context. You stroll through Ponyville and then to Fluttershy’s cottage. She thanks you for the spa appointment. “It was my pleasure Fluttershy.” She sits there just looking at you, her wings twitching occasionally. “I probably should be heading home,” you turn before looking back to her, “My friend-“ A pressure hits your face with a warmth upon your lips.

It takes a second to register that Fluttershy is that much closer and standing upright. You blink plainly, your mind a pile of mush. She finally retracts herself from you and sees your stunned form. ”Oh fiddle. Please don’t hate me Anon it’s just... you’ve been so nice and… aww shoot.”

Did she- No. She’s so shy there’s no way. That’s crazy talk. You finally muster the will to look at her moist eyes dripping with sadness. ”I’m sorry,” she cries and reaches for the handle. You wrap your arms around her and return the favor, yours a bit more forceful. It’s her turn to be petrified, but she melts in your warm embrace. The two of you sit there, locked together, hearts fluttering. When you finally pull away you leave Fluttershy panting for air, “Wow.”

“You can say that again.” You regain your composure and rub the back of your neck.

”I thought… I thought you weren’t into mares.”

“So did I.” Damn, you’re starting to go soft.

She rubs her eyes, “So what now?”

“I wish I knew.”

”If you want to talk about it, I’ll be here.” You nod, you have to get some time alone.

“Sure uh, I’ll see you later Fluttershy.”

Your exit was awkward, but in no way a bad decision. This wasn’t just something that occurred and you can move past. This shit’s a big deal. You can’t just expect to kiss a pony and forget about it. Did the others feel this way when it happened to them? Were they scared? Angry? Sad? Fluttershy opened your mind to a whole new realm of thinking. Now it’s your job to explore it before making any brash decisions, and there’s one thing that helps you think clearly. Booze.

~~~

You find The Broken Record and slip inside while things are still slow. Duff’s taking the day off so you can’t mooch off him this time. Thankfully his marefriend Vinyl is working. She puts on a new record and joins you at the bar. ”What’s your poison?”

“A Hard Hinney if you don’t mind.”

”That’s some tough stuff, rough day?”

The barkeep pours you the shot and you take the acidic draft down your throat. “Let’s call it interesting.”

“Oh do tell,” she says leaning in. You tell her about the spa and how she enjoyed herself tremendously. ”She’s one lucky mare, Duff never took me there,” she says with a hint of jealousy.

“It costs an arm and a leg, let me tell ya.” You sling back two more. “And when I was walking Fluttershy back home… I don’t know how it happened.” You set down your glass and fight back against the booze seeping into you. “We… We kissed.”

”Awww shit!” someone says behind you. The marine’s grin’s as wide as the grand canyon.

“How long have you been listening in?”

”Long enough to know someone’s a bit of a hypocrite”

Vinyl gives him a flustered look, “I give you the night off and you still come into work?”

”I can’t stay away.” He sits next to you and orders his usual.

”I’ll leave you two alone now, get back to the guests,” Vinyl says as she heads towards the stage.

”So you weren’t all that serious about the whole ‘species’ thing huh?”

“It happened so fast, I wasn’t thinking clearly.”

”You better not have told her that!”

“Of course not. I didn’t want to destroy what we had, but… Is this normal? To feel this- happy, with a pony.”

”Anon, if you had asked me that question back when I was in training, you would’ve been on the first trip to the hospital.”

“Remind me never to meet you in the past.”

”But you’re damn lucky to have what you do. I wish I could connect with Vinyl the same way you do with Fluttershy.”

“But we’re not even the same species. This isn’t natural.”

“Love is blind. It sees not sex, nor race, nor species. For love is blind, and lovers too.”

“Shakespeare?”

”Nope, Duff.” He rests a hand on your shoulder, “If I were you, take it slow. The last thing you want to do is rush into this.”

“Doesn’t that ignore every instinct men have regarding relationships?”

”Yeah, for fleeting relationships. What you have is real, don’t forget that.”

“You’re right Duff. You’re always right.”

”Just whenever I feel like it,” he jokes, “Now get outta here, you’re cramping my style.”

“Gonna pull out all the stops?”

”Anon, I am the stops.”

You fail to stop yourself from laughing at the absurdity of his statement. “I’ll see you later dude, try not to wear yourself out.”

~~~

You hit the road and take a walk in the dark. You see Twilight’s house, her shadow cast off by the fireplace as she reads with her assistant Spike. Rarity’s boutique lies dormant save for her graceful whinnies of slumber. You overhear the dinging and clashing of pans within Sugarcube Corner, Mous and Pinkie up making some concoction. You spot Applejack with her brother and sister closing up shop, their ties close. Mickey and Anonymous chase after a cyan blip in the sky, their tension vanished into the night’s sky. They all have someone, somepony to be beside them.

You weren’t short of friends on earth, but they were just… there. It was as if they were just numbers, a cold fact in your life that never truly mattered. You look up from your feet and to the picket fence that runs across her house. She was different.

She isn’t just another thing that lies about; she’s a warm body amongst the icy tundra. Oh god you’re spouting metaphors. It comes with the mood you reckon. You start up to her house at a steady pace. She’s probably asleep, all the lights are out. You’ll just quickly knock and if she doesn’t answer you’ll head right on back. Damn it Anon you’re wasting your time. You tap on the door. You should’ve just went home and- Fluttershy looks to your through the open door, “Anon.”

“Fluttershy…”

You step through and hug the little Pegasus before you change your mind. You don’t care anymore. You love Fluttershy from the tips of her wings to the soles of her hooves. ”Please don’t leave again.”

You close your eyes and keep her close. “I wouldn’t dare.”

~~~

Meanwhile in Canterlot…

You hum blissfully as you stitch the wound closed ignoring his muffled screams. “The results are going to be just spectacular. I always wanted to witness the creation of life.” You tap his forehead with the hilt of your knife. “I’m sure you wouldn’t agree with me given your situation, but oh how fun it will be.”

He twists and turns in his chains but you’ve got him locked up nice and tight. “Parasprite eggs are rare, but oooh were they worth the effort. They tend to ignore the more bloody food groups, but I think they’ll develop a taste for it.”

”Anon, what are you doing down here?” Ooh so she’s decided to come down and visit you. How kind.

“Just showing some kindness to my guests. Do come and join us.”

She steps into the dim recesses of your chamber, her eyes open wide in the glow of your achievement. ”What in Celestia’s name…”

You try to wipe the blood off your nose, only getting more spread over your face. “Like it? I call them, Stages of Madness. First, they try to keep calm, but that never lasts long. Then you have anger, and I love ‘em feisty. But then-“

”Anon!”

“Yes my shining star?”

”What are you doing to these people?”

You laugh maniacally. Just what aren’t you doing? “I’ve got an acid transfusion, slow roast, bug breeders, you name it. I don’t know how I stopped for so long.”

She stares at you for a time, “Look- I’ve got another task for you.” Your very soul bursts into joy at the idea. ”This one is serious, no funny business.”

“Oh Luna, I was looking forward to another guest. Who’s the target?”

“He’s a foreigner. He’s gained evidence of my connection to some of our allies and he needs to be eliminated. He’ll be here soon enough.”

“And why can’t your allies take care of him?”

“He’s not some pony, he’s a human like you, known as Flash.” What luck! To finally hunt your own once more.

“I can’t wait for the reunion.”

Comments

[Bastinator]

3600107
Well, Spartanon had a reason to use Halo quotes and references, it was Halo. If it comes to me when I'm writing, I put it in.

[Aslatiel]

Where is the next chapter!

[Aslatiel]

If flash dies, and I am sure he will not I will not be a happy camper. He was my 3rd favorite. Prince of glaemar power!