Rise of an Empire, Fall of Another

by Kyuubi325

Chapter 32

Crystal Empire
Crystal Castle
Balcony
6:01pm

Cadence was pacing back and forth behind the shimmering curtains blocking her view of the square below. She was worried about the burning. More and more guards were having to be sent back to Equestria to recuperate after being attacked by Crystal ponies, and many new businesses had been burned or looted recently. It was almost anarchy, and the guard had had little luck in trying to quell the unrest. Luckily Shining Armor had widely decided to veto the trade of Britainian goods, as from what little news they had been getting from down south those same goods were turning her home country on its head. Just imagining all the ponies who were put out of work made her sick to her stomach. The pink Alicorn had spent many an hour on the throne, resting her chin on her hoof while trying to think of anything she may have missed with her speech. With tensions between the Crystal Ponies and the Equestrian immigrants at an all time high this could make or break everything. One wrong word and everything she had done to make sure the Crystal Empire was as peaceful as Equestria once was could end in ash

Her beloved husband trotted into the room looked a little worried, he wore his dress uniform compete with helmet. "Cadence I think this is a mistake this doesn't seem right... we are low on guards, the Crystal Ponies are unhappy, and the Heart is losing power. I think we should... stop this.... now... it's a mistake..." he says to his wife while he stand before her.

Cadence shook her head and then looked him right in the eyes. "Shining change is always hard but look at Equestria, sure it's having some issues but that's because of he influx non Equestrian goods. Don't you want the Crystal Ponies to be as happy as Equestria was? Don't they deserve that much after everything they have endured?" She asked tilting her head a little hurt they he didn't trust her.

Shining kicked his right hoof against the Crystal Silk Carpet and seemed to think about what he was about to say. "Honey I don't agree with what you are doing, they aren't Equestrians they have there own rich and diverse culture. Why should they have to adapt to our ways and lose a large chunk of who they are? It isn't right, sure I'm a little intimidated at times or even confused by their ways but I have been trying to learn them. Cadence if you do this you will destroying their culture, their way of life, have you even bothered to see what they think about all this?" He asked taking a step forward looking at her.

Cadence snorted looking a tad upset. "Shining they are my ponies I know what they need this burning it will be painful but it's necessary are you telling me books that speak of killing and Art that shows bleeding wounds is good?!" She gets off from her thrown and trots up to him pushing her hoof to her chest. "I'm doing as I was taught by Celestia herself are you telling me she's wrong?!"

He pushed her hoof off him and leaned forward to look her right in the eyes standing his ground. "Maybe look around Cadence look at what they built with only their front hooves. Even Canterlot can't hold a candle to this place just look outside! Each one of their shops is a unique piece of art, compare them to any one of these shops to a place in Canterlot! While you have been up here in the Castle deciding what you think is best for them I was out there seeing what they really needed! Ever since you started importing Equestrian citizens more and more of your so called subjects have be forced out of work and now we have slums Cadence! Slums! What sort of country imports foreigners and makes its subjects live in slums!!!" He yelled back into her face making her stutter. "They aren't Equestrians Cadence, you ever think that all the lesions you learned from Celestia don't apply here?!"

Cadence backed away from him unsteadily in shock that the stallion of her dreams would talk to her in such a manner. "S-Shining...." she swallows trying to form words but her emotions were running high and her brain struggled to catch up. Tears slowly started to pour down her pink cheeks.

"Cadence if not for them then for me.... please stop this before its to late.... otherwise..... I don't think I can stand to be with you..." Shining turned around and made his way out of the shimmering crystal room that seemed to grow dinner as the pink Alicorns heart shattered.

She shook in her regalia as countless emotions raged through her head making her stumble as the room seemed to spin the sparkling crystal and brightly colored banners of the Heart did little to soothe the headache.

"Your majesty? They have finished preparing for the burning...... are you ready for your speech?...." The pain Arctic blue mare named Sapphire Joy slowly entered looked worse for the wear. She had dark circles under her eyes and looked as it she was ready to drop at any moment. "The Crystal Ponies are waiting....." she motioned to the soft coral curtains that just fluttered gently from an outside breeze.

Cadence choked and nodded as she tryed to straiten out her regalia and mane before slowly motioning for Sapphire Joy to lift the curtains. The mare seemed to pause before her mind caught up and she pulled a rope that raised them allowing Cadence to reveal herself. She trotted out to the great Crystal Balcony with all the grace and elegance Celestia had taught her from birth. Below her nearly every pony of her small kingdom stood below her it was a veritable sea of ponies however would could see a clear distinction between the Crystal Ponies and the Equestrians. To the far left of her a small but considerable group of immigrants from her homeland who looked up at her with smiles but for over four fifths of the crowd they remained silent. She expected some soft cheer or applause but her subjects were eerily silent while only the Equestrians seemed to cheer for her.

"G-Greetings my beloved subjects, the past two years have b-been hard for us all but a new dawn is coming! This burning is only the first step into a brighter future! I know many of you are unhappy with my changes but a past of blood and violence will only bring future conflict! So we must erase the past and create the history you deserve! For what good is history if it only brings us sadness and despair?! You struggled under the yoke of Sombra now it's time for an era of bliss, pease, and prosperity!!" The Equestrians cheer loudly for her but something was off about the Crystal ponies the just stood there watching as the Royal guard held them back from the Crystal Square where a mountainous pile of books, paintings, wooden carvings, statues, and even some rather.... suggestive clothing from one of the..... Comfort mares some of the taverns would have.

She started to charge her horn as her powerful magics surrounded her as she started to take careful aim. That's when she saw a faint glint of something in the crowd of Crystal Ponies. Likely just the simmering coat of her subjects after all. That's when a loud band was heard and something grazed the side of her face. He spell flew from her horn into the dome magicaly dissipating into nothing. She raised a shaking hoof to her muzzle and felt a trickle of blood. "W-wha?..... a-a..... assassin!!!" She shouted at the top of her lungs before a chant began below her.

"Mors ad alicorn!!! Falsum!!! Reversi repellendi advenae in solitudine frigida!!! Pereat diabolus in pullos, induitiones!!" The chant started to flow through the crowd and the Royal Guard stallions started to back away from the strange words the ponys were chanting.

Cadence mind was buzzing trying to figure out what they were saying as she was pulled back into the castle by her personal guard. More shots were heard at the Royal Guard line was breaking before rapidly retreating to the castle not nothing to be organized leaving many of there own trapped outside. But something far worse was happening down below.

Crystal Empire
Crystal Square
6:12pm

It was as compete chaos below the castle as the Royal Guard retreated back into the castle and barricaded themselves in leaving the Crystal Ponies to reclaim what they had lost from the pile. Guns that had been hidden in the crowd fired off at random intervals. The few Crystal Ponies who were armed were soon reinforced with revolutionarys who had been waited just outside the city to strike they ran through the streets making sure to hurl Molotov cocktails into Equestrian owned shops as they stampeded though the streets. Countless ponies charged through the streets all converging into the square.

The Equestrians we left to fend for themselves as the crowds of angry revolutionaries slowly closed in on them. They lowered there weapons at the frightened ponies and seemed to wait before an unseen order seemed to flow threw the crowd.

"P-please can't we talk about this l-like rational ponies?.... W-we're all Equestrians after all..." Timid looking emerald green mare slowly stepped forward shaking but showing impressive bravery compared to he compatriots.

The silence was deafening as the faces of the rebels didn't even seemed dazed but what she said one blank faced Crystal Pony stepped forward. She smiled thinking for a moment she had managed to get through she raised her hoof to shake. The stallion looked at her hoof before smashing her face with his hoof. She fell to the ground in a sniveling heap.

"We aren't Equestrians..... we are Crystal Ponies!!!" The stallion shouted down at her before the other revolutionaries opened fire. The Equestrians didn't stand a chance as the bullets flew impacting them the Stens didn't stop firing for 5 minutes. The scene before the mob was horrific body's of Equestrians layed before them soaking the Crystal Square in blood there were a few moans and twitching hooves as a few moved in to finish off the survivors. The most horrifying thing?.... they didn't even spare the foals.

Crystal Empire
Crystal Castle
The Great Hall
6:27pm

Cadence was shaking on her thrown as the Royal Guard barricaded the doors with what ever they could find in the castle. The Guard were unnerved as they gathered what weapon they had but that mostly consisted of spears... less then 60 enchanted spears from her homeland against an uncountable amount of rebels. She flinched everytime she hear a gun shots outside she could only imagine what waited outside for her and her family.

Shining Armor ran in just before they closed the last door behind him and began to baracade it. "Candece! Flurry Heart is missing!!! I went to her nursery but the bassinet was empty!!!" The stallion looks worse for the wear. "I-I searched the entire wing but she was gone!!! Someone stole my daughter!!" He yells breaking down at the thought of just what was happening to her now.

Cadnece just sat there as her heart was breaking her Empire was slipping out of her hooves and her beloved child lost. "W-We can salvage this! S-surely I-if I talk with them I can..... I can...... convince them to stand down a-and return Flurry and... and..."

"Cadence it's over! We have less then 100 guards ready for active combat! Never mind we can only arm about 50 or 60 of them! We would need an entire army and from the looks of things down there even if we had one it would be pyrrhic!!!..... a-at this point I just want our child back.... how long do you think we can hold up in here Cadence?..... a week? A month?.... a year?.... and that's just taking into account our provisions in the castle..... they could break down those doors and it would all be over..... I'm going to wait a few days then send out one of my guards.... see if I can negotiate our surrender.... and the return of my baby.... I just hope they will be willing to let us leave......" he swallows as he try's to comfort his sobbing wife trying to convince her it would all be alright.

Crystal Empire
Shimmering Bay
Crystal Ship "Seas Emerald"
8:11pm

Below the deck of the old three master schooner a single Crystal Pony and a screaming infant sat and waited under the glow of an oil lantern. Amethyst watched the crying infant as she rested in an improvised crib made from an old weapons crate and some hay. Even though she nearly destroyed everything he couldn't bring himself to hate her. She was just an scared infant with no idea what she had done to warrant her treatment. The rings were locked onto her horn likely giving her a rather nasty headache but he couldn't risk one her her magical outbursts. They were just finishing loading up the ship and soon they would head out to sea with the child they couldn't risk her magic sinking the ship after all.

The infant continues to cry for a few more minutes before he finally relented and lifted the child to his chest. He rested on the chair holding the sniffing goal close to him as he tried to calm her. "You probably don't understand me.... but.... I'm sorry.... you can't help that your so dangerous but.... I'm taking you somewhere safe.... I can promise you that....." he says holding her letting her slowly calm down listening to his heart beat.

Author's Note:

Sorry this chapter was originally going to be longer and have the debate between Celestia and the Emperor but I felt like it didn't fit well into this chapter. I also wanted to post it since I know some of you feel like I take too long, I would like to apologize for the slow updates but my classes have been time consuming but I will try to update more often.

Comments

[ShadowEclipse]

Yup, knew one of the Big Cities (Empire) would reject the Change. Forcing a belief or understanding on a different Culture without giving it's people a Choice, Always leads to "Revolt".

[Architect Ironturtle]

Hmm. The sentence fragments are gone, but you've still got quite a few run-ons. Here, this is the first paragraph. Take a look at the changes I make to it.

Before:

Cadence was pacing back and forth behind the shimmering curtains she was worried about the burning. More and more guards were having to be sent back to Equestria to recuperate after being attacked by Crystal ponies. Many new businesses had been burned or looted by the ponies. It was anarchy luckily Shining Armor had widely decided to veto the trade of Britainian goods from what little news they had been getting from down south it was turning her home country on its head. Just imagining all the ponies who were put out of work made her sick to her stomach. The pink Alicorn sat on a throne as she rested her chin on her hoof trying to think of anything she may have missed with her speech, after all with tensions between the Crystal Ponies and the Equestrian immigrants this could make or break everything. One wrong word and everything she had done to make sure the Crystal Empire was as peaceful as Equestria once was could end in ash.

The highlighted sentence is particularly good. Please use more like it in the future.

After:

Cadence was pacing back and forth behind the shimmering curtains blocking her view of the square below. She was worried about the burning. More and more guards were having to be sent back to Equestria to recuperate after being attacked by Crystal ponies, and many new businesses had been burned or looted recently. It was almost anarchy, and the guard had had little luck in trying to quell the unrest. Luckily Shining Armor had widely decided to veto the trade of Britainian goods, as from what little news they had been getting from down south those same goods were turning her home country on its head. Just imagining all the ponies who were put out of work made her sick to her stomach. The pink Alicorn had spent many an hour on the throne, resting her chin on her hoof while trying to think of anything she may have missed with her speech. With tensions between the Crystal Ponies and the Equestrian immigrants at an all time high this could make or break everything. One wrong word and everything she had done to make sure the Crystal Empire was as peaceful as Equestria once was could end in ash.

My changes were small, mostly adding periods and transition phrases to make the story flow more smoothly. Since your chapters are relatively short I have a suggestion for the next, in addition to my challenge to eliminate all run-on sentences: read your entire chapter out loud to yourself before posting. If it feels awkward to say it's awkward to read.

[EternalLurker]

So ever since you first mentioned the book burning, or even just the suppression of of history in general I cringe for a couple reasons. The first one comes straight from real life, it was kinda black comedy in my history department every time the Texas Board of Education would change their history standards, they always seemed to remove some unpleasant aspect of American history and insert more biblical stuff, and since Texas is such a large state the new books tend to go to a lot of other states as well.

Second, your Cadance's runs counter to what we have seen of her even in the most recent season, I actually think I would have much less issues with the choices you have made had your story appeared during season 1 or 2, but that is not really important the point I actually wanted to get to was this. Your characters, for me often do not speak in their 'own voice', rather I feel like it is 'you' talking through them, if that makes any sense, I really noticed it here with Cadance and Shinning Armor, but also Celestia, Twilight, Rarity, Big Mac, and Blueblood, and a few others. Now with some of them, their cannon characterization is scant enough that there really is no choice their but with others, well I do wish authors would sometimes ask themselves, "Dose this need to be said or done by this cannon character? Or would an OC work better".

Now onto something positive, because my field of study was history I really cant sympathize with Cadance or Celestia, and it is really hard for me to see them as competent because of this choice as well, however you stole Cadances baby from her and thus have forced me to sympathize with her, that is very frustrating, which seems to be what your going for, so good job there.

Finally and this is often a sensitive topic I have been really hesitant to bring up and I really hope you aren't offended by it, and I was going to hold of mentioning it till after you had Celestia and the Emperor meet, but after this chapter I want to point it out before you set that chapter in stone. So from what I can tell your basic goal thought the story with most of the cannon characters has been to remove the 'shine' from them, while raising secondary or tertiary characters 'up' so to speak.

The problem for me is that this has seemingly created a rather consistent tend of female characters, being emotional unstable, ignorant or just plain wrong when compared to a male character they are arguing , or even just talking with. We see it with Apple Jack and Big Mac, Rainbow Dash and Big Mac, Rarity and Blueblood (ugh) Twilight and Fancy Pants (twice), Featherweight and two of the crusaders, and in this chapter Cadance and Shinning Armor. I think that is something you really should keep in mind going forward, especial with the two big leaders meeting in what I assume is the next chapter.

To finish, once again you have shown consistent improvement across the board so keep up the good work.

[Ponywarrior]

This was a pretty good chapter though I do wonder what the crowd said exactly that triggered the revolution and I wonder how Amethyst managed to get into nursery take Flurry Heart from her bassinet get those rings on her horn and get her out of the palace and to the ship all without anyone noticing until it was to late one would think Cadence or at least Shining would have there daughters room guarded at all times.

The sad part of all this this all could have been avoided if Cadence had just listened to shining armor or the crystal Ponies who complained or left the palace and actually saw how much her actions well meaning or not were hurting the Crystal Ponies but she chose to not listen and now it's blown up in her face.

[njq348]

And The revolution has begun! I just hope they don't turn communism like russia, but that would be stupid since it's a cultural revolution.

[PirateLord93]

Luckily Shining Armor had widely decided to veto the trade of Britainian goods, as from what little news they had been getting from down south those same goods were turning her home country on its head. Just imagining all the ponies who were put out of work made her sick to her stomach.

Yet she's perfectly fine with all the crystal ponies losing their jobs and businesses.