• Published 4th Jun 2017
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Ofolrodi - Imploding Colon



Rainbow Dash traverses the perils of the Dark Side of the world to reach the Midnight Armory.

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Hold Onto Your Flanks

Rainbow Dash scampered down a stairwell and took a right turn. Ahead of her, the manacables and metal fasteners flickered along the length of the corridor's low ceiling.

"There, Rainbow Dash!" Twilight Sparkle pointed as Rainbow's friends phased ahead of her. "Forwards and towards the left!"

"I see it!" Rainbow growled, flapping her wings to give herself a little boost. "I know I'm fast, but outrunning pure magic is a tall order!"

"The air's shiftin'," Applejack said. "Do you feel that?"

"We're about to enter an enormous room!" Rarity said. "Slow down, Rainbow! There are lots of randomly jutting objects!"

Rainbow Dash only half-heeded her warning. She galloped through a doorframe and into a great black void. Her ruby pendant caught the edges of numerous metal spokes and gears and manacoils. Grimacing, she scuffled to a stop before she could slice herself on any of the dormant instruments.

"Oh goodness...!" Fluttershy glanced all around. "Did we enter the Machine Layer?"

"Nah..." Rainbow shook her head. "Too deep."

"Besides, the machinery in this room was built by mortal hooves," Rarity said, her ghostly horn glowing. "I've sensed the real thing up on the Light Side. There's a clear difference."

"But..." Pinkie looked at Twilight and Rarity. "Didn't alicorns carve this place up?"

"Reckon they hollowed the mesa out for sure," Applejack said, peering up at the looming metal contraptions. "But everythang else musta been filled in by the folks from Emeraldine." She whistled, her green eyes tracing the lengths of metal levers and pulleys. "Good golly... it's like a convoluted cider makin' machine in this place!"

"I really don't think the Emeraldinians came to Darkreach to produce cider, AJ," Rainbow Dash droned.

Applejack smirked at her. "Bet you wish that they did."

Rainbow Dash sighed long and hard. "Yeah... ... ..."

From the corridors above and behind Rainbow, echoing hoofsteps and voices could be heard.

"Rainbow?! Rainbow Dash?!? Did you find the source?!?"

"Incoming Flynn!" Pinkie chortled.

"And Wildcard's not far behind," Fluttershy said.

Rainbow turned around and hollered through the generator room's entrance. "I'm down here guys! Don't charge in! It's pretty cramped and bulky in here!"

Not long later, a balding unicorn and goggled griffon stumbled to a stop in the doorframe.

"Ah jeez...!" Flynn leaned against a wall, panting for breath. Sweat glistened from the illumination of his horn. "I was worried for a second there, Rainbow..."

"Dudes..." Rainbow smiled crookedly. "It's alright. I've got the girls with me."

Flynn gulped. "Guess I-I keep forgetting that part..."

"Awwwwww..." Rarity smiled at the others. "It's so deliciously sweet how much he cares."

"Give it a sec," Applejack droned. "He'll be droolin' over the ancient machinery soon enough."

"Oh wow..." Stars filled Flynn's good eye as his muzzle dropped and his limp limbs carried him forward. He gazed up, up, up at the towering machinery... his ears drooping in awe. "...so this is the generator room. Look at all that ancient Emeraldinian tech..."

"Cylindrimanian," Rainbow Dash corrected. "Don't forget that, buddy. I've seen this sort of grimy gears'n'tesla coil cereal before." She huffed, pivoting about to gaze lethargically at the dormant metalwork. "It's got New Ring City written all over it."

"Yes, but that was all in present day," Flynn stammered. "Still, must have been no less of a wonder to behold..."

"I dunno. I was too bummed out by the dead foals at the time."

Flynn glanced over. "Dead foals?"

Rainbow Dash heard a pained squeak emanate from Pinkie and Fluttershy.

"Uhhhhhhhh—but enough of that!" Rainbow grinned awkwardly. "What can we do to get the juice running in this place again?"

"Goddess help me..." Flynn rubbed his scalp. "I-I don't even know where to start!"

In the meantime, Wildcard silently shuffled past them. The griffin's tail flicked contemplatively as he peered up into the forest of metal parts... dangling chains... dead-still axels...

Rainbow looked at Flynn. She lightly smacked the stallion upside the head. "Give him light, ya melon fudge!"

"O-oh! Right!" Flynn licked his lips, shone his horn brighter, and stepped right up to Wildcard. "Any sign of a crystalline buffer assembly?"

Wildcard peered and peered across the glaring spotlight. His goggles rattled, and he pointed his one claw up through the mess of machinery.

"What?" Twilight squinted. "What is Wildcard pointing at?"

"I... don't see it..." Flynn squinted. "You sure you've spotted it? Should be full of spent, dormant crytals."

"Rainbow..." Rarity leaned in. "...above the centrifuge, five feet left of the perpendicular gears."

"Uhhhhhhh..." Rainbow spoke into Flynn's ears. "Rarity says 'above the centrifuge, five feet left of the porcupine gears.'"

"I said 'perpendicular', darling—"

"I see it!" Flynn gasped, spotting a giant porous sphere of metal looming beyond the angle of Wildcard's pointed claw. "Wow! It's bigger than I expected!"

"That's what she said!" Pinkie said, then floated backwards as she giggle-snorted.

"Wow." Applejack droned. "Reckon that's a first."

"And it won't be the laaaaaaast!" Pinkie winked.

"Soooooooooo..." Rainbow glanced between Flynn and Wildcard then back up at the suspended sphere. Half of its holes were full of dead, dull crystals. "Is that thingy really the core of the entire generator?"

"I suspect as much. Genius engineering." Flynn smiled. "From the looks of it, the machine is designed to hold ten times as many crystals as is required—most likely to conserve mana while establishing a spherical leyline web of renewable harmonic energies."

"Sooooooooo..." Rainbow glanced at Wildcard who was likewise dumbstruck. "...that means what exactly?"

Flynn sighed, rolling his one good eye. "We stick a few crystal shards into it one at a time like a pincushion until we have enough juice to boot up the generator for a test run."

"Oh..." Rainbow and Wildcard nodded vigorously. "Why didn't you say so?"

"Meh..."

Rainbow gulped. "So... uh... how do we begin?"


"Just two more!" Flynn hollered from below, shining his magic spotlight up through the metalworks.

Rainbow Dash and Wildcard levitated beside the central core's sphere. Rainbow cradled a mess of crystals in her fetlocks while the Desperado reached in with his one talon and slid the final two shards into their respective holes.

"You sure that's enough?!" Rainbow called down. "This thing looks like a porcupine that's been through chemo!"

"Honestly, Rainbow..." Rarity sighed. "What is your obsession with porcupines lately—?"

"No! It's perfect!" Flynn hollered from below. "We don't want to overload the manacircuits! Especially if this thing hasn't been booted up in Goddess-knows-how long!"

Wildcard and Rainbow exchanged glances.

"Sooooo... uh... what now?"

"You'll wanna fly down from there!" Flynn said, casually trotting over to a series of levers and dials embedded in a cylindrical dais. "Assuming this whole place gets moving again, we wouldn't want you both being decapitated by the swinging machinery!"

"!!!" Wildcard dove in a blink.

Rainbow Dash swiftly followed them.

"Okaaaaaaay..." Flynn cracked his neck and flexed his forelimbs. "...moment of truth."

"If you're gonna yank a lever... just yank a lever," Rainbow droned.

"Shhhhhh!" Flynn squinted aside at her with a smug smile. "Please, Rainbow... this is a stuation that calls for professional lever yankage."

Wildcard snorted.

"Oh hush." Flynn stared into the instrument panel. Licking his lips, he aimed his horn at a crystal diode. Flash He illuminated the first one... then another diode two spaces over... and finally he charged mana into a miniature tesla coil.

Whurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

The air hummed with dull electricity.

"Alright..." A shuddering breath, and the Heraldite rubbed his hooves together. "Here goes..." He reached for a lever.

Rainbow and her ghostly friends watched intently.

"Rnnngh!" Flynn yanked.

Grkkkk—vrmmmmmmmmmmm... The chamber around them shook, rattled, and died.

Wildcard raised an eyecrest.

"It's okay." Flynn re-gripped the lever, tightening his muscles. "That's to be expected. Just got... to crank it!" He yanked again.

Grkkk-kkk-kkkk—vrmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

"Oh jeez... oh jeez..." Pinkie hopped and hopped and hopped in midair. "The tensionnn!"

Fluttershy covered her eyes. "Tell me when it's over!" Applejack patted her shoulder.

"Ohhhhhhhh..." Twilight practically drooled through an anticipatory grin. "I can't wait! This is so exciting!"

"Heh heh heh heh heh..." That last voice didn't come from any of the girls.

"... ... ...?" Rainbow Dash stared into the crytals she was cradling.

A hairy muzzle smiled. A sharp fang glinted. "Aaaaaaaaaand boom goes the Dark Side."

Rainbow paled. Her blood ran cold as she looked up at Flynn and Wildcard. With a jolt, she blurted: "No! Wait—"

"Rnnngh!" Flynn cranked one last time.

Rainbow flinched hard, dropping all of the crystals loudly to the floor.

But in the meantime—

VROMMMMMMMMMMM! The entire room lit up with a flash... the settled to a cool blue glow. And as for the machinery above them...

Clkkkk—Clkkkk—Clkkk—Clkk—Clk-Clk-Clk-Clk! THUMMMMMM!

The ancient machinery twirled, spun, and rolled to life. Soon the entire room was purring like a giant metal kitten underground. The core of crystals shimmered elegantly while the grimy gears and axels spun into a smooth blur.

"Ha ha ha!" Flynn hopped up and down. "Now we're talking! Wooo! Looks like we're in business, folks!"

Wildcard, in the meantime, was staring confusedly at Rainbow. He glanced at all of the crystals she had dropped, and then his goggles reflected her breathless face.

Rainbow panted and panted. She looked at the shiny shards—but the chaotic reflection was gone.

"You alright, sugarcube?" Applejack asked. "Things are up and runnin', it seems. Ain't that a good thang?"

"Yeah..." Rainbow Dash shuddered. "Sure it is..."

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