Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.
“Trixie's hooves are getting tired,” the unicorn muttered as the group lurched along. “How long has Trixie been walking?”
“You tell us, Shiny!” Daring Do said as the five mares traversed the edge of a dark abyss along the lateral edge of a winding cavern. “I thought your horn was doing the gruntwork! Not your legs!”
“Hmmph...” Trixie frowned, sweating. “This darn shard of yours is proving to be far more elusive than Trixie imagined!” She glanced over her shoulder. “Just what is it gonna do when we find it?” She blinked. “Besides fix Trixie's house...”
“A lot of good in our hooves,” Rainbow said. “A lot of bad in theirs.”
“Just where are the bad-bad-baddies, anyway?” Pinkie asked, inexplicably wearing a black tuxedo and a top hat. “Did we lose them at the last Clopper Barrel? Heeeheehee-snkkkt!”
“The further we trot away from those miscreants, the better, Trixie says!”
“You should really look where you're walking, Trixie,” Maud droned. “One slip, and you'll fall into a pit of evil rocks.”
“Pfft. How do you know they're evil, Meredith?” Daring asked.
A three-and-a-half-second blink. “Because they're not smiling.”
“Say, you're the resident rock-whisperer,” Daring said with a smile. “Could you tell if we're getting any higher or deeper in the belly of the earth?”
“It's less like a belly and more like a womb,” Maud muttered.
“Oooh!” Pinkie grinned. “Does that mean when its water breaks, we'll have struck an aquafer?!”
“Once again, Pinkie, your poignant rock humor has left me in stitches.”
“Heeheehee! I-I know! Hahaha! You really can't control yourself, can ya, Maud?!”
“Ungh!” Trixie moaned, stumbling with each step. “Can somepony carry Trixie?! I swear... I'm going to collapse on my Great and Powerful tushie!”
“'Tushie?!'” Daring raised an eyebrow. “What are you, five?”
“Well, just what do you call your behind?”
“My compass guide! HA! Get it?!”
“Nnnnngh...”
“That was everypony's favorite part of Daring Do and the Bloodstone Boils. They all asked about it at the last Megacolt Convention...”
“I had bloodstone boils once,” Maud murmured. A blink. “It was not fun.”
“Yeah, well, that's the magic of a good book, girl. You can make light of anything that you otherwise couldn't... erm... sit out.”
“I will take your anecdote into consideration.”
All the while, Rainbow Dash was flexing her forelimb, wincing at the feel of a slight tingling sensation. “Darn it,” she muttered, flying high above the group. “It hasn't even been three days, has it?”
Lancie stuck his head out of the satchel. “Three days? Has it only been that long?”
“Shhh!” Rainbow hissed. “Keep your voice down!”
“Because I could have sworn you spent at least a week-and-a-half inside that last mine shaft alone.”
“Where were you when my friends were plunging to their deaths?”
“Wondering why I wasn't plunging along with them in order to qualify as your friend.” He smirked. “Quite a motley crew you have assembled, by the way. Or perhaps I should say 'maudly crew.'”
“Unnnnnnnnnngh...” Rainbow groaned.
“Heh! Sorry! Couldn't resist!” Lancie smirked. “Admit it. You knew I had to throw one in at least.”
“What are you moaning about, Dashie?” Pinkie chirped from below.
“Uhhhhh...” Rainbow fidgeted.
“Psssst...” Lancie pointed a stone talon at Rainbow's legs. “No shame in resting them. I think it'd be good for morale.”
Rainbow glanced over her shoulder. “Since when did you get so smart?” she murmured.
“Just minding your P's and Q's for you,” he said, ducking back into the saddlebag. “But mostly just the Q's.”
“Uh huh. Sure.”
“Dashie...?”
Rainbow cleared her throat and glanced down. “We should... like... take a break.”
“Yes!” Trixie wheezed, slumping against the wall of a flat plateau overlooking the abyss. “Finally!”
“Pfft!” Daring spun, glaring. “You serious?”
“We're going to be no good arriving at our destination if we're all dead tired!”
“Well, nuts to that!” Pinkie said, frowning. “I'm not even remotely tired!” She stood in place for a few seconds. “... ... ...” THUD! She face-planted, instantly snoring. “Zzzzzzz-shnorrrrrrrr.”
As her top hat slowly fluttered down to rest on her poofy pink head, Maud strolled over, grabbed her by the tail, and slid her over to the wall beside Trixie. “I'll look after her... make sure Pinkie doesn't roll into a deathly plunge in the middle of her slumber.”
“Ungh...” Daring rolled her eyes. “Oh, alright.” She smirked. “But I'm on guard duty first!”
“Guard duty?” Rainbow asked.
“Yeah! Y'know... cycled waking patrols! I know we've put some distance between us and the Jerk Squad.”
“Not to mention several twists and turns, thanks to yours truly,” Trixie yawned.
“Right. But you need somepony loyal and trustworthy and dashing to make sure that no one gets the jump on us while we're sawing wood!”
“Whatever floats your boat, girl,” Rainbow said as she sat down beside Trixie and Maud.
“Heh, at least I'm fit enough to keep rowing it!”
Rainbow said nothing.
“That's it?” Daring squinted. “No snappy comeback or egotistical kick to the groin?”
“Wake me up when I care,” Rainbow grunted, curling up against the wall and shutting her eyes.
Daring blinked. “Hmmph...” She frowned, folded her forelimbs, and went fluttering off down the edge of the underground canyon.
Trixie blinked, then smiled tiredly at Rainbow. “Congratulations. I think that miffed her more than anything else could have.”
“Hmmmm...” Rainbow smiled sleepily. “I've perfected my passive-aggressiveness.”
“Indeed, you have!”
“Comes from listening to you all the time,” Rainbow yawned.
“The Great and Powerful Trixie agrees with—Hey!”
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Though the numbness is coming on faster... She's gonna need Discord's help.
Yes, Rainbow, put up your passive-aggressive hoofticuffs! I think you have her on the ropes!
If Rainbow uses her wish this time to built Trixie a new house, I swear to god...
5150066 She'll probably use her wish to revive Pinkie's family, that was slaughtered by the mafia ponies while Dash and friends were in the mine.
Well shit. See what all this adventuring is doing to you, Rainbow? And what do you want to bet that Pinkie finds out about all this... or is already in the know?
Hell, she's Pinkie.
...
Then again, this is SS&E. Who the buck knows?
Uh… is this a reference to what I think it might be?
This chapter. This. Chapter. This is the best chapter.
Could it be? Have I finally arrived? OH MOST GLORIOUS DAY!
I'm caught up with Appledashery after starting it... a month ago. In my defense I've been simultaneously reading half a dozen other books at the same time. Wait... now I have to wait for the next chapter...
Rainbow, Two. Trixie and Daring, Zero.
'maudly crew.'” Fav Maud pun so far!
Lancie...