Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.
"Here, let Trixie help you with that, Sparkle."
"I've got the map, Trixie."
"But—"
"I've got it!" Twilight frowned over her shoulder, levitating the leaflet away from the other unicorn's peering eyes. "Good grief! This isn't a lab experiment! You don't have to assist me with everything!"
"But you could get a paper cut with the way you're handling it."
Twilight squinted. "I'm levitating it, Trixie. How could I get a paper cut?"
Trixie tilted her nose up. "You've done it before, Sparkle. I've seen you."
"Ungh..." Twilight quickened her pace to shuffle ahead of the group.
Trixie quickened her pace to keep up. "And if you get a paper cut, you won't be able to handle all of your books! Then Trixie will h-have to manage the experiments first-hoof! And Trixie isn't sure if Trixie can!"
"For crying out loud! I'm fine, Trixie! Now will you... st-stop crowding me? I need to read the map so I can lead us to Winsome Falls!"
"Come on, gals..." Applejack smirked, sweating ever so slightly as she drew the wagon through the wooded path. "None of us need that there map. I know these woods like the back of my hoof. The Apple Family's been takin' hikes to Winsome Falls since I was a lil' apple seed." She chuckled. "Besides! Ain't no race! Let's get there when we get there! I've got time off! You've got time off! Let's all do this relaxin'-like, ya feel me?"
"You hear that, Trixie?" Twilight smirked, eyelashes fluttering. "Applejack says to relax."
"Right!" Trixie reached in. "So give Trixie the map so you can relax!"
"Eugh... Trixie, I swear! You're impossible at times!"
"Heh..." Applejack shook her head in mid-stride. She glanced aside at Pinkie Pie who was bouncing along with Rarity to the right of her. "They go on and on like lil' sisters, ya reckon?"
"The littlest of sisters!" Pinkie chirped.
"Actually..." Rarity tilted the brim of her sunhat with a coy smile. "I was going to suggest a pair, alright... but not sisters."
"Oh?" Applejack glanced back while pulling the wagon along. "How do ya figure, then? Like a pair of cousins?"
"Hmmm-hehehehe..." Rarity shook her head with a dainty laught. "No no, Applejack. Something a bit more amorous than that."
Applejack fidgeted, blushing slightly. "...erm... st-step brothers?"
"Haven't you ever seen an old married couple bicker, Applejack?"
"Erm..." Applejack looked ahead, wincing slightly. "N-no, Rarity. I can't rightly say I have."
"Ohhhhh..." Rarity's ears folded back. "Of course I didn't mean it like that darling."
"I mean... I reckon I get where yer comin' from. But..." Applejack chuckled. "Twilight and... that pony?" she whispered. "I'd much rather see Spike gettin' toasty with a fire hydrant!"
"Heehee!" Pinkie grinned sideways. "One makes fires! The other one puts them out!"
"All things considered, stranger things have happened," Rarity said. "Why, I once had these two high school friends who hated each other's guts. Absolutely detestable in one another's presence! You couldn't enjoy a single conversation with the two of them within eyeshot without them getting into some horrible argument after another."
"Lemme guess..." Applejack droned, gazing ahead as they traversed a bend in the path. "At yer first reunion, they turned out to be married."
"Actually, no. They both perished in the Great Fillydelphia Flood three years ago."
"... ... ..." Applejack blinked. "Oh..."
"But I know they would absolutely have made the most stunning couple had they lived long enough to wear my ensembles at the Gala."
"And in speaking of stunninnnnng..." Pinkie bounced closer to Applejack, eyebrows wagging. "I'm still trying to find my hoofsies after being floored by that nuzzliest of nuzzles back there."
"Buh?"
"Hmmmm—yes. Pinkie is quite... on point," Rarity said.
"Heehee! The Pinkie Point!"
"Just how much sweat have you and the esteemed Mr. Leaves been sharing on the farm as of late, Applejack, dear?" Rarity craned her neck. "Hmmm?"
"Now dun y'all start." Applejack nevertheless bore a freckled smirk as she drew the wagon along. "Stu and I are just... really good friends, is all."
"Really really really really really really good friends!" Pinkie sang.
"Darling, you two spend all of your time together!" Rarity exhaled. "Ever since Apple Bloom recovered, I hardly see you two apart!"
"Well... of course!" Applejack blinked. "I mean... I've got family and he's got pegasus duties. And then there's... uhm... financial meetings with Fancy Pants... and of course dinner and livestock feedin' and usin' the outhouse..."
"Psssst!" Pinkie leaned in to Rarity. "She hasn't said 'nap time' yet!"
"Heeeeeeeeeee..." Rarity bit her lip, squealing mischievously. "I know!"
"I was gettin' to that!" Applejack frowned.
"Oh Applejack. Your orange coat is most fiery when you blush."
"Dag nabbit! He's a gentlecolt! And I ain't no revolvin' door!"
Thud! Leaves scattered on the three mares' flanks.
"...?" Curious, Applejack and the other two looked behind them.
Rainbow rubbed her head, having just bumped into a tree whose branches were shaking above them. "Erm... my bad..." She smiled nervously. "Uh... got distracted with the... scenery."
Applejack blinked. She opened her muzzle to say something—
"In all seriousness, Applejack, I must say..." Rarity trotted closer. "You do have a... fine friend in that stallion. And if it were to become more than that, then don't feel like you need to hold back from asking for some frank advice. You know... from mare to mare—"
"—PIES!" Pinkie hollered. "Bake him lots and lots of pies! Stallions love pies!"
"Eugh... Pinkie..." Rarity sighed.
"What?! It's true! I learned it in Rock Camp!"
"I have no interest in fillin' this camp trip with a bunch of dag blame'd useless gossip." Applejack snarled. "And I sure as Tartarus ain't bakin' no stallion no pies!" She stared ahead.
Pinkie grinned. "What's Stu's favorite flavor?"
"Blueberry—" Applejack went crosseyed. She stomped her hooves. "Dag nabbit!"
Pinkie and Rarity giggled together.
Floating up from behind, Rainbow Dash sighed. She hung her head.
A yellow hoof rested on her shoulder. Rainbow turned to see Fluttershy smiling at her.
"Ahem..." Fluttersy calmly spoke towards the group. "I know! Who here knows some good hiking songs?"
"Trixie does!"
"... ... ...anypony else?"
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Well, this conversation took several sobering turns.
Like Lyra and Bon Bon?
Dag nabbit, Stu! Ain't AJ's flanks enough for...
Oh. Never mind.
But... but... how?
RD's emotions must be like roller coaster listening to that conversation. One second it sounds like AJ isn't interested in Stu at all, the next she's perfect for him. Must be torture
...poor Trixie.
Oh, and uh, Rainbow too.
...and if AJ bakes any blueberry pies for Stu...
Poor Stu's stomach. We all remember the last time Applejack tried baking something...
No, Applejack. No! You're supposed to be falling for Rainbow Dash!
Albeit she's not doing the greatest of jobs to win you over, but I have absolute faith that she'll step up her game.
6717322 It's Twilight, if there's a way to break reason and logic, she'll find it.
In all seriousness, she was probably reading and walked into a wall mid page turn.
Well, AJ may not be a revolving door, but we know which way she swings, and who for.
ugh, Twixie, another pairing I detest. Give me Twinkie or Raritwi or leave Twilight single!
Fluttershy really taking charge lately.
edit: well, it I'm gonna go ahead and guess that my preferred Twilight ships caused those downvotes.
Fishberry scampers into a long hallway lined with attractive teak trestle side-tables, and slowly moves down the line, flipping each and every one of them with a loud clatter.
6717401
Rainbow Dunce is just floating along, not helping Freckles pull that heavy wagon. What's up with that! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!
... Trixie's persistence in trying to be important and helpful and feel included is really cute.
Hey rarity. Shut. Up.
I think this type of torture is banned by the Geneva conventions.
I think we all can agree Rarity is best pony.
I have to admit, I'm really liking Trixie in this arc.
Come on, Rainbow. Your girl is right below you. Talking about someone else. Step up your game! We know you can be a charming bottle of golden syrup, so what are you waiting for?
I, for one, am enjoying this greatly.
I ship it.
Ha! That would've been way funnier if it didn't mean anything between Stu and Aj.
And question.
We were promised cuddling, correct? Cuddling between who exactly?
~ADG
Awwwww, Trixie is such an adorable butt monkey. I think I prefer her in writing.
Ain't no other pony got a map like me; I'm Twilightlicious.
(I still adore that the show actually acknowledged that one.)
Shipper on deck.
... Rarity.
Oh Skirts.
Bah. Stupid leaves.
No, they’re just friends.