This isn't where I belong. I left all this behind years ago, moved on with my life. But a mare from my past brought me back, and now she won't let me go. So I'm stuck here, trying to make the best of it with ponies that don't understand me, don't even like me. But when something moves in the darkness, and when things go wrong in the cold, dead night, they'll turn to me to try to set things right.

Why? Because once a police pony, always a police pony.
~~
This is a spin-off story to 'Why am I Pinkie Pie?!', and will contain spoilers for that story, but it's not necessary to read that story to understand this one.
Cover art by the talented Conicer
Need more Cinnamon Swirl? Merlos the Mad wrote a fanfic of this story!

There is now a side-story: A Hard Day's Nightmare Night

While harvesting apples, Applejack is approached by a curious young lamb who has a simple but difficult question:

Why are ponies in charge of sheep and cows and other sentient races?

Applejack explains how this came to be, and why ponies are in charge.

It is the year 3070, and Mankind is once again at war. The battlefields of the future are dominated by fierce, robotic war machines known as BattleMechs, and under their auspice empires have risen and fell. Now with the worlds of the Inner Sphere once again facing the drums of war, two mercenary units have set off on their respective missions, their only tie a common ride upon the back of a JumpShip.

Yet when a cosmic accident causes a misjump, they find themselves thrown into a world that they cannot fathom: a world where magic is a force of nature, where mythical creatures live and thrive, and colorful ponies live protected under the aegis of their monarchs. New choices lie ahead, decisions must be made, and the inner character of Humankind will be put to the test when the question is asked: to conquer, or protect?

--------

It is the year 1023 after the ascension of Celestia and Luna to the dual thrones of Equestria, and Ponykind is at peace. With Luna cleansed and Discord sealed away even more thoroughly than before, all looks bright for the future of the colorful equines. With friendship and optimism, they face each day with hope and vigor.

Yet, when the heavens scream as a foreign object tears its way into their reality, the princesses and their subjects face a new threat that they cannot fathom: creatures and machines from a world of death and darkness, where magic is unheard of and the avarice of powerful men drive the engines of war to crush the innocent under their bootheels. Can they survive the coming of these coarse beings, and can they maintain the magic of friendship in the face of Man's Inhumanity?

With Russian Translation provided by Undermind.

A crossover with the Battletech universe, though this is an alternate BT timeline of my own devising. [WARNING: Fandom related material and fanboy rant to follow. Non-Battletech fans won't care, read at your own risk.]

Because **** the Word of Blake and their munch-tastic "armies from thin air" BS. Yes, I know the Clans were almost as bad, but at least they had some sort of justification in-universe. Wobbies? No. Just no. I don't care that it was 15 years, you don't go from "fringe group of mutually-antagonistic and argumentative sub-groups following various degrees of religious mania" to "WE ARE THE SPACE NAZIS ALL WILL BOW BEFORE US" like that.

So for BT fans, this is a 'verse where the Second Star League is still around, the Wobbies still had their temper tantrum though it was smaller and more in line with a bunch of religious fanatics. No stupid "knock everything down for ClickyTech" Wizkids/Fanpro approach, nor any "hey let's shove a bunch of cheesy Level 3 stuff at the players to make the game even more complicated" Catalyst Games stuff. This is just good ol' fashioned 'Mechs wailing on each other, only with ponies. Who will also be wailing on 'Mechs. GLORIOUS.

Cover image by Icaron of DeviantArt.

How do you make a story out of a chaotic hodgepodge of ever shifting and random pairings? That's a good question. How do you do that? Anyway, I tried. Heaven help me, I tried.

--

This fic was inspired by Bronycon and the “Twilight’s Secret Shipfic Folder” card game, which I and other writers there played the hell out of. In fact, it is my attempt at a direct re-creation of a game in narrative form. Bolded words are a direct call-back to the cards being played.
You can also find info about the game itself here. And it was so worth the purchase. No regrets!

A sleeping Rarity mysteriously appears in her friends' beds, and nopony knows how or why. Her friends are determined to discover the truth behind Rarity's night-time snuggling spree.

Flash Sentry has a breakdown upon realizing that the last two girls he found attractive were actually transformed ponies, and begins questioning his sexuality.

A few years after Twilight and Celestia's marriage, they begin to worry that their obligations to the job are interfering with their obligations to each other. So they decide to take a break. A few spells and perfectly legal papers later, and they are ready to start their lives as Sunny Skies and Dusky Sparks, just your average, everyday, married couple living and working in a suburb of Manehatten.

(Non chronological story, with many chapters based on prompts for the Twilestia Group Collab.)

Rated T for Tantalizing.

Cosmic balance is a fickle thing. Sometimes, creatures like Luna and Celestia can work as independent agents of Harmony, at least one of them present assured the element's presence in the world.

But what of Discord and Chaos? What happens when the master of the matter is sucked dry of his power, no longer worthy to represent it?

Simple. A foal is born.

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Vector by the awesome MLP Scribbles
Image edits by Piercing Sight
Editing by Piercing Sight
Everything by Piercing Sight, go give him so love, yo.

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Featured on 09/08/2014 *flings some streamers and confetti*

One average morning, one average princess, one average kitchen, and one average bag of whole wheat bread slices... No one could mess this up.

One-Shot about beloved Luna doing perhaps one of the most mundane of tasks.

[Second Person Perspective] [Applejack x You]

It's been thirteen years since you've ended up in Equestria. Time sure flies by doesn't it? Why not have some memories?

Thanks to TheArtrix for the cover art.