Anonymous, asshole extraordinaire and a rotten egg by all accounts, has fallen on good times after being made a commander of the Storm King's vast armies. With the King's forces and equipment at his fingers, he's found great success conquering nations, sowing chaos, and kicking the asses of all walks of life. All while having a rip-roaring great time doing it.
But the day of the Storm King's biggest conquest to date - the nation of Equestria - looms just around the corner. All that's left now is the final few preparations for the invasion: loose ends to tie up, new weapons to seize, and even some co-commanders to annoy to no end. And once those are complete, Anon will be the first in line to take Equestria as his next conquest.
God help us all.

This isn't the first horse story I've written, but it is the first one that is prose instead of greentext. And I'm still a bit rusty on top of all that. Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated!

Semper Pie is one of Equestria's most honored and decorated soldiers. Protector of the innocent, hero of countless battles, champion of all ponykind. Even Shining Armor, ex-Captain of the Royal Guard, and Prince Consort to the Crystal Princess, looks up to this great stallion. Truly one of the best and greatest ponies to have ever served under the Royal Sister's banner.

Still, where did he come from? Where was he born? What has he done? Does he have any family? Why would he suddenly want to come to Ponyville?

And why, for the love of Celestia, does he specifically want to meet with the Element of Laughter herself?

“I’ve been in the land of Equestria for a few months now, and I have seen some of the most mind-boggling things one can ever imagine seeing. When I’d managed to finish that birdbath a few days ago, I have never, not even in my wildest dreams—not in a million lifetimes—would I ever seen an alicorn floating around inside of it.”

(Because of popular demand this story has been placed on the incomplete list, also Chapter titles and name has been edited to better represent the story. Thanks to Jakomi of the Rose for the name suggestion.)

A group of pony radicals try to summon a demon to overthrow the princesses. Instead they got a human. They don't know what a human is.

((Pre Princess Twilight))

((Edit: Featured 5/11/2020. Didn't expect this to go over so well!))
((Edit2: Ch.8 featured 10/1/2020))
((Edit3: Featured 10/22/2020))
((Final Edit: Featured 3/25/2021))

A normal day was all it took.
A simple failed prototype, a missed experiment.
There was an explosion, and I woke up. I don't really know what happened between those two events, but I'm fairly certain I shouldn't have awoken in a small, dark box.

I'm scared.

Cover art by the amazing Avatar of Madness!

Twilight has a secret coltfriend who nobody knows about.  Not even her.

And he’s not too sure either.

Then Luna gets involved, and it only gets weirder.

Editors: Tek, Mitch H, Airy Words
Cover photo: Getty images

This story is a sequel to Future

My name is Private Halberd Wings of 139th Arial Spear Regiment's 2nd Platoon.

My home, Equestria, came to Earth fourteen years ago in order to help a species called humanity who was on the brink of destroying themselves with their hatred, technology, and greedy ways. The Princesses, in their great wisdom, offered a chance to save them from themselves by making them ponies like us. However, they rejected us, and now we're at war.

I have joined the cause to defend Equestria and see these humans are given a proper future guided by friendship and harmony. It doesn't matter what comes our way for Equestria has never lost a war and we will not lose one now. With the fires of friendship, and the guidance of our Princesses, we will be victorious!

***

A Prequel to Negotiations

Please Help Out The NegotiationsVerse TV Tropes Page

Anonymous has his heartbroken once again, leading to him becoming a recluse. The only time he ever leaves his home now is either for groceries, work, or alcohol. Mostly it's for alcohol. One night, he meets a bat pony mare who needs a place to stay.

We walk down our long roads of life, but what of the roads not taken? Twilight and Applejack are carried along a different path, where their fates were bound in new ways. Fresh sorrows and avoided crisis gives friendship's flower a new shape.

This story will make an alternative universe, but will start grounded in the world we know. Have you read my other works? I love canon. I will respect canon, but we are also changing a core fact, and its effects will ripple outward. Our beloved ponies will be changed, as they must. The stream of fate carries them on tides we never witnessed before.

Twilight, Applejack, I hope you're both ready. Come, the water's fine, and I invite you to swim with me. Let us see what would happen if Applejack's mother survived where fate had once demanded her end.

Done for a patron, will update 1/month with 4k chapters.

Cover art by Jowybean!

Anon and Luna find themselves engaged after a night of drinking. Neither are too happy about the situation.

Cover art by NixWorld.