Twilight Sparkle is being sent to Ponyville to learn about friendship. She's not happy about it.
Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student
by milesprower06
Hiatus Bonus Chapter
SUMMER SUN CELEBRATION
Dear Princess Celestia,
So the Summer Sun Celebration is rapidly approaching, and I wanted to tell you how excited I am for it. After that whole mess with Nightmare Moon, Ponyville's first celebration went off so well that they're getting it again this year. I wanted to know if there's anything I can do to help. Preparing for this event is no small task. Thanks, and I hope to hear from you!
Sincerely,
Spike
Dear Spike,
Twilight is heading up the Summer Sun Celebration, so I'm not really the one to ask. I imagine if she doesn't have enough volunteers, she would force the work onto you, or brainwash more ponies into helping her.
Regards,
Princess Celestia
Dear Spike,
I know you said you could attend any event you wanted that was not considered 'official', but I'm afraid there's been a change. Since my coronation, any royal event in Ponyville automatically falls under my jurisdiction. Celestia had things set up separately before, but since it's a Ponyville event again, it's going to work by my No Non-Equines Policy. This is a non-discriminate action. I will be removing Cranky from the event as well.
Sorry, but please do not try to show to the event. You will be turned away at the door.
-Twilight
Twilight,
So I suppose that's why you haven't been enlisting my help in preparing, huh? Because you don't want to feel obligated to let me participate in the festivities? The one time I actually WANT to help you, you turn me away because you don't want me at your event?
Have you created a machine that runs on dragon tears, and are looking to collect a fuel source?
Fuck you, your Royal Bitchness
To Spike,
I know that tolerating Twilight can be...difficult at times, but if you're looking for something to do on the night of the SSC, might I recommend a EWE show? We're coming to Ponyville on the same night. We're gonna have some of your favorite superstars there, like Macho Mare Candy Savage, and the most electrifying chef in all of entertainment, The Wok.
I imagine, given your experience, you would enjoy seeing ponies beating the crap out of each other. So I have enclosed two VIP backstage passes for you and Cranky, both for Buckdown and Monday Night Dawww.
Hope to see you there!
Sincerely,
Discord
EWE General Manager
Comments complaining about hiatus status will be removed. Enough said.
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Ratta ratta ratta
Also, good chapter. :D
Have Discord send Twilight a Laxative-laced Cake in one letter
Let's get ready to Rumbbbblllleeee!!!! (except we'd need a third ticket, and he's a little young to be attending EWE)
You know, at my job, anytime someone make terrible puns they get pelted with pun rocks. Give me your address so I can mail you some.
2538833 AM I supposed to pelt myself upon receiving said rocks, or is the envelope spring loaded?
We have a winner.
2538833 I will Shrek you so hard if you even come near 2538841
And then Zecora cried herself to sleep. :(
2538841
Of course you need to throw them at yourself. He already put in half the effort just mailing them. Work, man! Those rocks won't throw themselves!
But no seriously, another perfectly great hiatus chapter.
Wow. This is getting...wierd.
So are you ever going to make letters based on the comics because if not then perhaps you should just delete that one and give it to someone else.
Also wow Twilight I wish I could I say I'd never thought you could be so heartless but then I'd sound stupid.
You have no idea how happy you've made me.
Macho mare candy savage? I nearly lost it there.
The Wok? Now my day is complete.
What? Why the hell would anyone complain about that?
Seriously, some people have too much time on their hands and desperately need SOMETHING to bitch about...
2539023 Yeah. Posted a warning because it happens every time.
Shit... why cant they just read the updated chapters anyways and simply enjoy lol
If they want to complain, they can complain about the fact that I have yet to win the Powerball... (gonna win it Wednesday this time!!!)
2538914 And it wasn't weird when it got into season 2?
2538841this comment was funnier than the chapter, which is average as far as this story goes. so still great by normal standards
Ohhh, I see what you're doing here. Getting ready for season 4, are we?
What the fuck is Monday Night Daww? All I can imagine is Fluttershy eating a bowl of cereal then playing with kittens for two hours.
Oh good grief, people are whining about THIS being on hiatus? Of course it's on bloody hiatus, we're out of bloody episodes!
Sorry, needed to rant. On the fic itself - While sometimes somewhat on the edge of what I'm comfortable with, it's kept me laughing throughout, including the hiatus chapters, so I'll just say, keep up the good work. :)
wow, their government is going to shit since twilicorn happened (then again, think of what is was before)
rabble rabble hiatus complaint rabble rabble
Poor Spike.
So why am I giggling.
HUR HUR Y U HIATUS BRO
Good chapter, loving the filler you do. Keep up the magnificent work.
All of my love. ALL OF IT!!
2538917 Patience, grasshopper.
2539625 Work.
2539058 Yes you keep telling yourself that. If you win then congrats, if not well no hard feelings right?
2539682 lol, if I win, my wish list will be GREATLY expanded!
2539703 As Pain from Disney's Hercules once said "Oh if. If is good."
2539702 Hey if you can come to Indiana and want to clean a church with me, then...well I'd love to have ya.
2538879
Zebra tears have a wide range of uses, I'm guessing. That, or she drank an aqueous prince Twilight wanted to hit on.
Snap into some Licorice!
I completely lost it at "Macho Mare Candy Savage".
[obligatory complaint about hiatus]
I can't wait for the episode where Spike leads a rebellion against the equine overlords, replacing the Princesses with a military dictatorship and having Twilight brutally executed. Which will probably never come, but a guy can dream, right?
I like that in contrast with Twilight, Discord is a pretty decent guy in this story.
Are Zebras equines? I think they might be, but I'm not sure.
2540471 Not in Twilight's book.
Please tell me the EWE mascot is a lamb.
2540212
^ This.
2540479
Even after my help with Trixie
She still acts discriminatory
So I think it's plain to see
My evil plans must come to be
With a little this and that
Which boil and brew here in my vat
I shall poison the water source
Ponies fearing me, par for the course!
2540212
Backed by his army of an aging Donkey and... uh...
Ha ! This might be the start of a great career for Spiky the Dragon Steamboat !
Aside from Twilight being her usual bitchy self, somepony actually did something legitimately nice in this chapter... and it was Discord.
MY EMOTIONS ARE CONFUSED .
Theres still going to be an Elizabeth right? I liked her...
The only question is, will Candy be able to snap into a slimjim?
IF YOU SMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLL What The Wok IS COOKING!
Funfact: lifting the ponies eyebrow is a move he stole from Trixie.
2541214
2541007 Cows. Lots of cows. And maybe some sheep. And probably some foreign assistance, too.
This could be spun off into a side-series almost too easily, it's awesome. Just have Discord host the events and give Iron Will a mic so he can provide commentary.
You. Are. Good. As soon as I have one I will mail you my first born son.
2541483
Iron Will teaming up with Trixie as a color commentator. Everypony already hates her, it's perfect !