Twiluna Fan(clop?)fic. Twi and Luna magically bound to each other. Gryphons massing at the borders. Chrysalis trying to get back into Equestria. Discord being Discord. Canterlot Nobles trying to tear Princess Twi's authority apart. YAY!
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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There is a lot of dialogue separation missing, I'm sorry to say... Difficult to tell when an element is speaking, because there's no indicator that it's happening. I think some formatting was lost in the upload.
“Four, and finally, I am Twilight mother-bucking Sparkle the Alicorn, and I am sick and tired of having to goose-step around the most revolting group of selfish, hateful, spiteful little Ponies I have ever met, who think invading my privacy and selling slanderous fairtailes about me with every other breath to the brainless idiots of Canterlot is their Faust-given right, so maybe it’s time I started to push back and show them why getting under my skin is a bad idea! Anything, pony or otherwise, that stands between me and getting Rarity the help she needs can kiss it’s plot goodbye, because I will run its ass over if I need to.”
Helllllllllllll yeah!
Twilight, expect an interesting reaction from Luna and Celestia if they find out about that.
I was wondering if Rainbow had ever reflected on just how close she was to killing Rarity (somewhere between inches & fractions of an inch). This chapter seems like she may have, but I don't remember it happening in-story.
This kind of chapter is why i keep reading the smut that you peddle . .
curse you for your writing talent! ò,Ó;,
This was a happy turn around as well as the easing of some scars for the characters.
I think that this simplification of plot is working for you. While you can do a ton of plot tracking and movement, your strong point is in character interactions. Rereading it all, i think that is the selling point for this story. I am no expert or writer myself so take it with a grain of salt.
Either way, just a good couple of chapters from you.
And i am calling right here as a prediction -
Mental tongue twisting stone breaks local pones universal point of view. Next time on same pone network, same pone channel.
8853373
As it stands, I think she deserves a bit more punishment for what she did do to her. Being laid up in the hospital without being in full traction is bad enough (I should know). Being laid up when you can't move and are in full traction...
*shudders*