Twilight Sparkle is being sent to Ponyville to learn about friendship. She's not happy about it.
Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student
by milesprower06
The Lost Letters
The Return of Queen Chrysalis: Part 1
Dear Princess Celestia,
Well, this mishap began with Appleblow, Sweetie Hell, and Scootalonely out in Fluttershy's backyard with all manner of woodland creatures, trying to get their cutie marks in hippology, which is the study of horses. Funny, I always thought the title of that was Rule 34. With no adult supervision whatsoever, they find themselves overwhelmed with animals.
So because glowing eyes are the least ominous thing to us, it takes us the better part of the day to realize that the populace has been replaced with Changelings. Retreating to the library, we immediately send a letter to you and basically get your answering machine. Pinkie gets us all stoned, which gives us the perfect changeling appearance. We make our way to the town pavilion, which is basically hive central. You know, because of the glowing green coming out of the windows. Confronting the changelings inside, do we come up with a good plan like only fighting ourselves? No. Rarity gives Pinkie's mane a beautifying treatment, and then treats her clones like last year's fashion line. Because clearly, nothing motivates her more. We weren't making enough progress, so Pinkie breaks out her Party Cannon, loaded with her Super-Sticky Double-Bubble Bubble Gum cake batter.
Say, where was your cake batter at the wedding, you junkie? We actually could've saved the day instead of having my brother and that slut wife of his stealing the spotlight. After releasing all the captured ponies, Fax Machine burps up a crystal globe, revealing that Queen Chrysalis had somehow hacked into him and gained remote access. She gives us three days to walk into a trap to rescue the three village idiots.
So instead of negotiating, you know, with the dozens of captured changelings we have, we put Spike in charge of harassing you until he gets a response, and we set off on a cross-country voyage to save the three fillies who would honestly be better off dead.
Your former student,
Twilight Sparkle
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Going to the comics now huh?
I didn't you'd ever get around to doing the comics. I have to say though, the language seems dialed back.
this is the comics? (never read them; haven't been able to find them)
2405567
Yes, from the comics. Can find 'em here
Hah, now time for comics :D And ones I read ^^ oooh I wanna see Twi react to knowledge what Spike is going to do through this whole journey of her and her friends : P
Important to note, this comic at least, played out before the start of S3, this has been confirmed by people like Mccarthy
Those comics were weird. It's like reading fanfiction written by Pinkie Pie. Are we sure they're canon?
I think you may want to reexamine what "Hiatus" means.
2405736 I think you'll want to reexamine what Hiatus Bonus Chapter means.
Dear Twilight Sparkle,
I have my hooves full right now, there are giant cocks all over Canterlot that I must attend too.
Your warrior princess,
Celestia
FLUTTERYAY! HE'S DOING THE COMICS NOW!
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw4878-d99.gif
Dear Twilight Sparkle,
Why don't you get off your lazy ass and just save the fillies? I know you are a bitch that cares more about getting laid than saving the lives of 3 fillies, but if you don't save these fillies, I will be forced to do 3 things to you:
1: I'll banish you to the moon.
2: I'll take away your magic
and 3, the worst of them all: I'll Fking spay you so you can't clop yourself while you are on the moon, with no magic, and only the Daleks to keep you company.
Your kind, caring, medically licensed Princess,
This is horribly well done.
Comic arc time? GLEE!
So now you're tackling the comics?
2405595 anyway to read them for free, like youtube does for the shows??
So I suppose there's no possibility you'll be able to wait until the end of May so those who've ordered the graphic novel won't get any spoilers, hm?
I don't consider the comics canon (but YAY! another Hiatus chapter!).
2405595
Thank you, I've been looking for these forever!
Wait, wait, wait, no mention of Spike having a copy of "To Serve Ponies" laying in the pile of books at the library?
2406298
You're welcome. That link goes to the comic series, the micros are on the same site, here.
Most recent comic is more expensive - price goes down when the next one is released.
2406384
Already bought all of them, waiting for the third to load...it's taking forever for some reason. Must be this crappy EtE wifi connection.
Shouldn't Twilight be signing her letters as princess Sparkle now or something?
2406442 read what hikaritoyami said about these comics here and it will make sense. it kinda like how phantom menace was to star wars. unless they made her alicorn in the comics too, i dunno.
Ha, comic story line.
2406829 Have an iPad? That's where I've got mine. Digital up in this bitch!
2406459 You wouldn't be the first. Go for it!
2406442 The comics take place between Seasons 2 and 3, and to my knowledge, are not considered canon to the TV show. It's just more content to parody while we wait out this hiatus.
2406599>>2407155
Oh, okay that makes sense thanks.
You just like writing this nutty ass shit don't you?
2407657 No. I absolutely hate it. Every single time I sit down at my word processor, I loathe having to do this chore.
What ever gave you the impression that I enjoy this?
Oh neat. Comics.
2408551 No, nothing specific. Just bought them from the iTunes bookstore.
Dear Twilight Sparkle:
Please hurry up. These three little braindead pigs are getting on my nerves, and I need them alive to bring your idiot minions here and feast on their love until they're nothing but soulless shells.
Your evil future mentor, Queen Chrysalis.
My god, you're doing the comics
And now we're into the comics. Well now, my day's been made... or early morning. Whichever .
2408595
That is an unfortunate result of failing to reread a post after editing.
P.S. I see what you did there
P.P.S. Love this new chapter.
Comics!
2413366
Oh wow, that was a bad pun...darn me for laughing!
I love Monty Python. So far, the Argument Clinic and the Cheese Shop Sketch are my favorites.
2418539 That's exactly how I am. I knew it was a joke, and I was making one.
2413951
I agree completely...
P.S.
Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!
Are you bored yet?
2409986
Yes, quite...
Now, how do I use Ambassador Pineapple properly?
Oh, yes...
*pulls pin*
ONE, TWO, FIVE!!!!
*throws grenade at random commentator for no reason*
Are the comics even worth buying?
Have you ever considered submitting this to Equestia Daily? You can find out how to do so here.
2426482 I have done so twice.
Rejected on grounds of being too out-of-character.
2426503
No offence and I find this fanfic really funny, but somehow this doesn't surprise me.
2426526 Did not surprise me in the least. I have very low opinions of EqD.
2140574
In what chapter did you pull that quote from?
2425719
Yes, yes they are. Right now you can get all of them for about $12 on comixology.com. That's where I read them, since I can't find any in the stores I have near me.